What it means to be me

This is what a normal day is like:

6:00 a.m.  I hear male owner (let's call him Owner #1 because I'm creative like that) wake up, drag his ass, pillow, and blanket from the bedroom to the living room.  He snoozes for a few minutes, then goes through his morning ritual and finally leaves the apartment without so much as a glance at me!

Between 7:00 and 8:00 a.m.  Owner #2 (the female one) wakes up, opens the front door, and lets me in the house.  She lets me inspect the laundry area, too.  I don't know why.  Since I barely get any morning exercise anymore, I run around the house for a few minutes. Owner #2 sometimes joins in and jogs in place in the kitchen.  I think she thinks she's fooling me into believing she's running too when she makes running noises with her feet and I run around her.  What a nut.  When she gets into the shower, I give her something to work with in the laundry area: poop.  Ha ha!

8:30 a.m.  Owner #2 refills my water and food dish and leaves for work.  Sometimes I get a pat for sitting down obediently while she locks the gate.

9:00 to 10:00 a.m.  I listen to Mike Enriquez deliver the morning news on DZBB.  He's pretty decent and entertaining.  After listening to him day in and day out, his way of talking has somehow rubbed off on my barking.  Brownie, the sexy slim askal* or aspin (as they preferred to be called these days) at the corner store, doesn't think it's cute or funny.

11:00 to 4:00 p.m.  Sleep.  What else can I do?  It's not like a similar dog of my size and breed can actually jump over the four-foot fence and escape to freedom and live an ideal nomadic life free of worries and responsibilities.  Besides, I have two humans to take care of.

4:30 p.m.  Mrs. Tomas of Apartment B unlocks the porch gate and lets me out so I can play in the common garage with my good pal, Neo.  My owners are not aware of this and I don't have any plans of telling them.  Do I enjoy these afternoon tea parties?  Sometimes.  Neo is an OK dog.  I like calling him "Curly".  He doesn't mind.  He looks like he could have descended from the extinct hardworking Turnspit breed, although I doubt if he does anything worthwhile with his time, much more turn meat for hours on end.

Whiskey, the taxidermied Turnspit a.k.a 
"Cooking Dog"
Courtesy: http://scribalterror.blogs.com

6:00 to 7:30 p.m.  The owners arrive from wherever they go to get money and food and things.  Sometimes Owner #1 takes me for a walk and on most days, Owner #2 lets me join her at U.P. for a run.  This is my favorite part of the day!

10:00 to 12:00 a.m.  After thoroughly checking the apartment for intruders of the rodent kind, I play with my chew toys or if it was run night, I would take a nap in my cozy, functional, and stylish Louis Vuitton Classic Day Bed in Monogram Multicolore canvas by Takashi Murakami.  As a dog with breeding, I never asked my owners how much they got the bed for but it's an L.V., so it must be at least 40,000 PHP (around 930 USD). 

My two favorite napping positions.

Me, working the L.V.

1:00 to 5:00 a.m.   Time for work!  While my owners rest, I stay up all night on the porch to guard the house.  This is also my ideal time to get inspired and blog.

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* askal or "asong kalye" means stray dog or literally, "street dog"